It was the middle of the afternoon and we were on vacation, just Lynne and I, and I think she was sleeping at the time while I drove. To pass the time I had a tape playing, of the New Testament, narrated by the English narrator, Alexander Scorby. If you have not had the chance to listen to him I recommend it. He has an ability to get you to hear the story in a totally new way with his accent, his inflections, his pauses, his punctuations, and his pronunciations. At that time, I was listening to Matthew 17 - had read it many times - heard it differently that day - will always be different now. I find myself going back to that moment in time many times over.
[20] He said to them, "Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith as a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, `Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you."
It was the more poignant since we were driving through mountains at the time. As I was looking at the mountains, I recall saying , "God, do you have any idea how big that mountain is? It's huge!" (stupid question). I remember so clearly, how it was as though a voice replied, "Yes. NOW do you realize how great faith is for life and living?" I recall feeling somewhat stunned at the simplicity of the answer. The emphasis or the accent came down on faith, tiny as mustard seed. Much emphasis has been given to having MORE faith or GREATER faith, or about believing more STRONGLY. For a moment in time I wasn't concerned about testing the strength of my faith to see if I could be the first to move that mountain over there into that Pacific Ocean over there. Instead I felt for that moment in time just how huge a mustard seed sized faith (real tiny faith - any faith) can be and is for life.
There are days I wrestle with the issue of faith and the healing of my leukemia. It has not happened. The Cancer is still there. Should I be in touch with someone who has a HUGE faith? Maybe I could find someone who has a track record of moving that mountain over there into that Pacific Ocean over there. And here's where I come out on that. A faith, any faith diminishes the overwhelming mountain of the Cancer and how great faith is for living with Cancer. Even mustard seed is enough.
No comments:
Post a Comment